Maybe I'm trippin but I am pissed off at Shine. I really don't have much room to be since he and I don't officailly date and have never expressed any real feelings beyond friendship but I found out some disturbing news about him yesterday evening. HE'S DATING THIS CHICK FROM MY CHURCH!
I really have to sort all this out in my head. From what I was innocently told by one of our friends, they just started seeing each other. But where I find issue is that he and I have become very very good friends and we flirt feverishly and stuff and there is no way he could have possibly figured I wouldn't find out, right? I mean seriously! Like I said, she goes to church with me! I know I'm way off base even having a problem with his decision. As it is, I am kinda "seeing" Soldierboy again but I've been holding myself back while I sorted feelings for the two of them. I always knew Shine doesn't want to be openly gay and have anything get back to his peeps about he's dating a dude. I understand that first-hand and would never divulge his private dealings! I guess he chose to go the cover-up route and date this woman. She's sweet and all but I just have these thoughts in the recesses of my mind that wish he and I would take a shot at being together.
I'm gonna leave him alone. I refuse to be messy or catty and try to ruin their chances at something significant. That's NOT me at all. If he wants to date a woman, then cool with me. We will be friends still but I really hope he doesn't just neglect to tell me from his own mouth that he is seeing her. What's the big secret? I thought we were better than that.....
Am I trippin??????
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